August 06, 2004

I have seen through the subterfuge

I had to zap the crap out of four different idiots today just to get something for breakfast, some fuel for this primitive vehicle that seems to be the current mode of transportation on this backward planet, then another when I wanted to sample this "Sno-Cone" item that seemed to be painted all over this tiny building with a long line waiting in front of it, and lastly I zapped that idiot that refused to pull off the road when I was in a hurry. I continued to observe the worthless beings on this planet and have discovered that they have disguised financial exchange documents in these little machines sitting here and there about town. From what I could understand of the crude mechanism was that you fed it a small card of some synthetic material and it would provide several documents you could trade for materials and services in the local area. I was not in possession of one of the synthetic material cards, so I gave the mechanism a good zap with my ray gun and it began to spit out all those little green documents, you know the ones, they have all these pictures of old members of the species supposedly in control of this planet. Now in possession of a large handful of these documents, I entered an eating establishment. I knew that was what it was from the smell coming out, the odor of a large slab of meat roasting over an open flame. I tried everything they offered and it was all edible. Everyone was so nice that I gave them the whole handful of documents in exchange for the food and service provided. Maybe not everyone on this backward planet deserves to be zapped. Maybe I will just zap the ones who can not cook worth a crap. Sounds like a plan, doesn't it? You can learn some amusing phrases by watching the educational video appliance occupying a major space in my new home.

Posted by Zongo the Ruthless at August 6, 2004 06:42 PM
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