August 11, 2004

OK, quit your whining already

I am getting so many continual requests that I delay zapping the crap out of some of you puny humans that I have taken the requests to my cold cold heart. I have come up with something that might be quite entertaining for all and will give me a way of finding which of the whiners is worthy of putting on the end of the list. I seem to have already moved some guy calling himself Turning Spoke for using my likeness in some silly film without having received the appropriate permission to do so. As such, the rest of you are no higher, currently, than No. 2 on the zap list. So, how do you get dropped toward the bottom of my list? Here is the plot.

Allow yourself to discharge the liquid biological waste from your body while still wearing your clothing or attempt to wet your clothing in such a way that it appears you did so, then take a picture of yourself or have your mother do so, and send it to me with a message telling me whether you actually allowed your liquid discharge to flow upon your clothing or chickened out and poured water upon your clothing to simulate such. I will then display the pictures and allow everyone who wants to drop down to the bottom of the list to guess who actually did discharge in their clothing and which ones did not. Those who correctly guess right get a free pass until the last day of zapping before I put the planet up for sale as fully conquered and ready for settlement. So, get those pictures made and email them to me before the end of this week.

The rumors that I am nothing but a disgruntled intergalactic furrier are without any factual basis.

Posted by Zongo the Ruthless at August 11, 2004 03:08 PM

I am ready to serve in your army of zappiness. I have fashioned a home-made ray gun that also shoots tacos. I love the little tacos...I love them good!

Posted by: Gir at August 12, 2004 01:40 AM

Aha! A loyal servant and an ingenious inventor, as well. Welcome to my army!

Posted by: Zongo the Ruthless at August 12, 2004 07:27 AM
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